Three in the night, it was completely silent except for the wailing
sound of an old hostel fan. The moon was on an off today, probably because it
had to attend her boyfriends “post break up” party. It seems like the whole
world had gathered to celebrate an END.
She felt light, all for the wrong reasons; it took her back to her childhood
days when usually due to her frail personality she always ended up being thrown up
in the air by her see-saw partner; Even
god made her weak. She felt the same today, the whole world on one side of
the see saw and there she was on the other side - teary eyed and shaken by her
misery.
Is this how light
feels?
Those very eyes of hers which according to him spoke a thousand words were now damp
and puffy due to constant stream of tears, now stood staring at her laptop
screen with her facebook page open. The words on the screen seemed to be fuzzy,
moving up and down as though they have a life of their own due to her moist eyes; They too probably are laughing their hearts
out. She has been reading the same words since morning - a proclamation of
her boyfriend’s happiness on facebook, ending their five year old relationship
that was once so beautiful for both of them.
How she hated Mark Zuckerberg now!! After all…didn’t he
create this draconian devil of an idea to woo back his lady love after a
breakup, and look what it does now, it allowed immature nitwits like her boyfriend to become
pseudo conquerors of the world by providing them their own wonderland where they are the King/Queen and to this throw in their pity minions(read:friends)
who never lose out on an opportunity to seek voyeuristic pleasure out of two folks
in conflict.
“How could it go wrong
then? What made him hate me so much that he had to “wash his dirty laundry
linen in public”? Where did all the love and respect go? Was it because he was
in love with some one else? Did he find some one who unlike me proclaimed to
the world that I loved him? Did he find someone who was full of spine???"
It was a barrage of questions flooding her mind right now. As
though the hazy vision wasn’t enough; it was now being supplemented by her
bleary cloud of thoughts. Nothing is
clear. How she wished to evade all her sufferings. How she wished to…she
wished to..wished to…yeah…END HER LIFE!!
“This
is the only way I can slap his face with a cruel realisation, the only way he
shall understand my value…the only way I redeem my conscience- Revenge is a dish best served when cold”
She looked around for things that could kill her - blade, sleeping pills,
flammable material…anything!
“How about the induction pan in the
hostel pantry...can I burn myself sitting on top of it?”
“Seriously!!
What are you thinking?? “
“How
about jumping from the top of the hostel block? “
“No...jumping
from a three storied building will only result in a few broken bones and far
worse………a broken pride!”
“Then…What
do I do…??!!”
That’s when a sound distracted her, the squeal of the fan and then...it
struck her!! She never knew her feeble
body would give her an extra option on her “means to death” list.
“She
was feeling light…”
She felt her heart pounding, muscles aching, lungs struggling to breathe,
a buzz in her ear. It seemed like the end. Then, a thought struck her –
“I should have played my favourite song for
one last time”.
As she felt eyes closing for one last time, never to be
opened again, she stared blankly at the facebook page trying to get a glimpse
of those dreadful words which caused all this:
“Feeling super cool today. Dumped my
new ex-girlfriend. Happy independence day."
She felt her eyes giving up…how she wished these were not the last words
she read……..
PS: Story inspired by this news article which kept hitting me again and again and of course fuelled by a recent personally experienced similar outburst in social media.
May the departed soul rest in peace.
